All material on this site, except where otherwise explicitly stated, is copyright of the author known as Ann Somerville. All art, except where otherwise explicitly stated, is copyright of the artist known as Kiriko Moth

  A fluffy tale

Copyright © 2007 Ann Somerville

A shrilling three inches from his ear had Julian upright and awake in under a second, but though his eyes were open, he couldn’t see. Once upon a time, he’d thought he’d gone blind in his sleep. Now he knew better.

“Pyon!”

Instantly his vision cleared as his kem jumped off his head. He looked down, just in time to see Pyon’s tail disappear inside his chest.

Julian sighed. If Pyon would stick around after he messed up, then Julian could explain the problem. But no, he always ran away and by the time he showed up again, his kem had forgotten the problem and Julian’s scolding had no impact.

No one else had this much problem with their kem. At least, they said they didn’t.

He yawned and climbed out of bed, scratching his stomach. The clothes on the bedroom floor were scattered about as if Pyon had been playing again. Julian really wished his kem would leave his stuff alone. He grabbed clean underwear and a shirt from the laundry pile—another day for keeping the jacket on, and he really had to make time for the ironing this weekend—and dove into the bathroom.

Pyon reappeared just in time to make Julian nearly spill coffee on himself as he collected his usual breakfast danish from the bakery on the way to the bus stop.

“Damn it! Pyon, don’t do that!”

Pyon jumped back inside again, but immediately stuck his head out again through Julian’s chest, green eyes bright and innocent. A complete lie, of course. Julian looked down at his kem and shook his head, shaking his hand clean of the spilled drops of coffee. “You’re going to land me in hospital, you know that.”

Pyon gave a sad little meep and disappeared. Julian walked out of the bakery, sipped some of his coffee to lower the level, took two huge bites of his Danish, and then looked up the road.

Crap! The bus was already heading down the road to the stop. He ran for it, tossing the coffee and shoving the Danish into his jacket pocket.

“Wait!”

He just managed to squeeze on at the end of the queue and spent the twenty minute journey with a strange woman’s ginger kem staring at him the entire way, her face almost in his, curious eyes watching him unblinkingly. Pyon didn’t rematerialise, for which Julian was grateful. He’d had to write a letter of apology to the transport company the last time his kem got playful and ran amok on a crowded bus. It wasn’t like he could stop Pyon, but he felt bad about that man’s arm. They should have been more careful about the way the doors opened, but still....

He arrived at the office exactly on time, and heaved a sigh of relief as he slid past reception and the hawkish gazes of Carol and her sleek silvery kem. Pyon popped his head out, all round-eyed and enquiring as soon as they were clear.

“Now don’t start messing around,” Julian warned. “You’ve got me in enough trouble this week.”

His kem chirped, materialised fully on Julian’s shoulder, and then ran off down the corridor, long tail bouncing cheerfully as he loped along, planning mischief. Julian shouted after him but only for form’s sake. His kem never did a damn thing he told him to. At least it meant he could pick up another coffee and finish his breakfast in peace as he read the morning’s emails.

Julian worked on the most urgent files, and handed them back to the paralegals who’d assigned them. The office buzzed with the quiet noises of keyboards and conversations, everyone too busy to chat idly until they’d cleared the backlog. An hour later, Pyon appeared, looking for cuddles, his nose twitching. Julian never believed those innocent eyes, but no one had called his desk to complain about his truant kem making a nuisance, so perhaps Pyon had only been socialising with the other office kems. He kept hoping Pyon would pick up some good habits from the others, but he never did.

He yawned his way through the more boring tasks, filing and preparing pro forma documents on autopilot. Pyon spent the time as he usually did, sometimes curled up on the pile of papers in the in-tray, or walking over the desk, occasionally running off with an excited chirp as he spotted a friend across the office. Everyone was used to him, though that didn’t stop the grumbling when Pyon’s excitable nature got the better of him again. After each little excursion, he always came back for a petting, and then he’d dematerialise for a few minutes. Recharging for more naughtiness, Julian’s Mum used to say—about the pair of them.

It was Gillian from Probate’s sixtieth birthday so they had cake for morning tea, and a little gift presentation. Julian always liked birthdays in the office because the local cake shop did smashing fruit and chocolate cakes, and the office broke out the good coffee as well. It seemed like everyone was there this morning—no one off sick or on leave—but the cake was big and Julian got a nice big slice with lots of lovely icing. He was starving as usual—it always seemed an age until lunch time.

Gillian blushed and got very emotional about the present. She’d be retiring soon and this was her last birthday in the office, so people had pushed the boat out for her. She made a little speech, people applauded heartily, and as the clapping died down, Julian looked across the crowd of co-workers. He blinked at what he saw.

“Who’s that?” he whispered to Liz, pointing discreetly to the handsome stranger standing next to a gaggle of paralegals and looking distinctly bored by the proceedings. The guy was tall—taller than any of the other men in the room—with sleek, black hair and strong, aristocratic features. He looked like a high-priced male model, and the last Julian had heard, Clarke, Saxony and Markham weren't hiring any of those.

“Oooh, he’s the new solicitor. Zachary Ledbetter. Disputes—they say he’s really sharp. Picky too.” She nudged him. “Good thing you’re not in his section.”

“Piss off,” he muttered, looking his fill at the astonishingly good-looking Mr Ledbetter before the man caught him at it.

Suddenly Pyon, who for once had been behaving pretty well and spending the party playing with a ball of paper someone had tossed down for him to keep him out of trouble, chirped and bolted across the room—straight towards at Zachary Ledbetter.

“Pyon, no!” Julian yelled as quietly as he could, but Pyon paid no attention. Julian grinned painfully and sidled over, hoping that Pyon was just distracted by someone’s kem or a new possible toy.

But luck wasn’t with him because Pyon bounced off Ledbetter’s feet, squeaked with delight and then scrambled up the man’s leg with his usual hyperactive speed. Startled, Ledbetter spilled coffee all over himself, just as Julian reached him.

“Pyon! I'm sorry, let me wipe that up for you. Pyon, naughty!”

Pyon meeped and disappeared. Typical.

As Julian dabbed ineffectually with a serviette at the soiled and expensive trousers, he looked up and found he was being stared at by two pairs of eyes—one cold, green and human, and the other, the golden gaze of the biggest kem he’d ever seen. He was gorgeous—and so was his host.

“Um...I'm really sorry. I have no idea why he’s so badly behaved.”

The man stepped back, shook his foot and his hand, and then extracted an immaculate handkerchief to wipe his fingers, disdaining Julian’s efforts while keeping up his unfriendly gaze.

“Don’t you? I do.”

And with that snide remark, he turned and walked away, his tawny kem still seated firmly and regally across his shoulders like a luxurious scarf.

Julian’s face burned hot with embarrassment—and then anger when he realised how rude the man had been. The paralegals were staring at him. He got to his feet.

“Pyon again,” he said with a sickly smile.

“You’ve blown it now, Julian,” Edward, one of the assistants in Debt, said. “That’s your chance of moving up a grade gone for a while.”

“Piss off,” he said low enough for Edward’s malicious ears alone. “It wasn’t me, it was him.”

“Always is. Still, you certainly made an impression.” Then he sniggered like a schoolboy, grimy creep that he was.

Julian wondered why his troublemaking kem couldn’t have made this smirking rat spill coffee all over himself instead of Tall Dark and Snotty. Edward deserved coffee-stained trousers, and more.

Morning tea was over by then. Julian snagged a second piece of cake to take back to his desk, but he felt too gloomy to do more than pick at it. What did that bastard mean by that comment? What did he ‘know’? They’d never met before—Julian hadn’t even seen him in the office. Supercilious damn solicitors.

He groused and grumbled his way through to lunch, and took himself bad-temperedly to the building’s shared canteen. He half-hoped he might see Ledbetter, but at the same time, the humiliation was so recent and painful, he didn’t know if he’d have done more than stutter at him. Pyon popped in and out but Julian was too distracted and cranky to do more than admonish him half-heartedly.

Anger gave way to depression as he realised Edward’s catty remarks were probably true. Julian had been looking for promotion and changing sections was part of that. Now Disputes was closed to him, most likely—he might even end up with a formal warning, depending on how mean the guy was. People weren’t usually blamed for their kems’ behaviour but Pyon was just such a damn pest. Cute but a nuisance.

And naturally, just as Julian thought that, his nuisance reappeared and sat in front of him, head tilted and his mouth open, showing his perfect pink tongue. Julian couldn’t resist scratching him under the jaw, which made Pyon purr and snuggle.

“Why do you have to be so naughty, hmmm? You’re sweet when you’re like this, but then you go off and ruin my life.”

No reply except a sad little squeak. Julian patted Pyon’s head. “Okay, enough of that.” he said, shoving Pyon gently away. “I guess I’ll need to work harder if I want that promotion.”

The afternoon dragged and his depression over the stupid coffee trouser thing didn’t really lift. It didn’t help that Edward seemed to be always there, smirking knowingly whenever Julian had to make a photocopy or fetch a file. It made him want to ask if the man had any work to do, but Edward was well in with the partners, untouchable, and able to get away with just about anything. His kem was actually really sweet and well-behaved, far too nice for someone like Edward. But no one chose their kems and kems couldn’t choose their hosts, so Lilbi was stuck with Edward just as Julian was stuck with Pyon. It wasn’t fair.

He got off the bus one stop early so he could pick up groceries. He was out of cheese and bread, and he figured he may as well pick up something for supper too. Shopping had to be thought about, since the supermarket sent Pyon crazy with delight. Julian had tried doing big shops less often, but that just given Pyon more chance to run riot, and Julian had now been banned from two supermarkets as a result. So now he just did quick runs at a store near the apartment, grabbing things as fast as he could, and apologising if necessary when he paid. So far it had sort of worked, but it was a damn nuisance having to shop every second day or so.

He liked the little store though, with its cool, shady interior and high-piled stock, the scents of spices and weird vegetables not exactly tempting but now familiar. One good thing about his regular visits, was that the shopkeeper now knew him well and was indulgent of Pyon madly dashing around as if he hadn’t seen the place at least a couple of hundred times or more. The man smiled at him as Julian rushed in, and his kem chirped in delight to see Pyon, who immediately jumped off Julian’s shoulder and rushed over to lick and cuddle his friend. Julian hoped that would keep the little brat out of mischief long enough for him to grab the essentials. He raced around, knowing where everything was by now, dumping it all in his basket and hoping to get out of here in under five minutes, which was as long as Pyon could usually behave himself for.

He ran around the end of a display, and nearly collided with someone. “Oh, sorry—” He stared at the man he’d nearly knocked over. “You!”

“Excuse me,” Zachary Ledbetter said as he made to move past Julian, his cold expression unchanged from the morning. The big kem sat on his shoulders again, his tail flicking lazily as if he was utterly bored by Julian’s presence.

“No...wait! Please...um.... Look, this morning...I'm really sorry about your trousers....”

“I don’t wish to talk about my clothing, thank you. Will you excuse me?”

“Yes...no, wait!”

Ledbetter’s eyes narrowed. “Are you always this impertinent?”

“Are you always this damn rude?” All the resentment he’d bottled up over the day came spilling out. “What the hell did you mean by that crack this morning?”

“I have no idea—”

“That, that... ‘I do’ crap. About Pyon. What did you mean?”

Ledbetter’s upper lip curled in a sneer and he started to walk away. Without thinking, Julian grabbed his arm, and the man, probably as startled at a mere assistant grabbing a solicitor in this manner, actually stopped.

“Why won’t you tell me? Pyon’s a bloody nuisance - if you know how to make him behave....”

Julian stopped as Ledbetter drew himself up to his considerable height, and his kem’s fur started to bristle. “Make your kem behave? Make him do anything? You have one of the most beautiful gifts known to mankind and you call him a ‘bloody nuisance’? You make me sick—you’re the nuisance. It’s you who doesn’t know how to behave. I pity your poor little fellow, having to put up with you. I wish there was some way of taking him away from you, but since there isn’t....” He sneered again, his green eyes narrowed icily. “You complain of his discipline? Look at you - you’re dirty, rumpled, dashing about like a lunatic, paying no attention to him...you don’t know where he is, do you?”

“He’s with the shop—”

“He’s behind you, terrified. And your kem is sick. Sick because you’ve made him sick.”

Julian whirled—and yes, there was Pyon, sitting on a display of cans, head tilted and looking rather wary. At least he wasn’t causing a problem. “He’s not sick.”

“Yes he is.” Julian felt Pyon dive inside him again, and Ledbetter pointed at his chest. “And there’s the proof. How many times a day does he do that?”

“I don’t know, maybe fifty—“

“Fifty? And do you know why?”

Julian frowned. “It’s what kems do. They need nourishment or something.”

“Or something, yes. Your kem is starving, and you’re feeding him junk.” Ledbetter grabbed Julian’s shopping basket off him. “Look at this rubbish. Biscuits, processed cheese, white bread...and you have dark circles under your eyes so you don’t sleep sufficiently, your skin is spotty and your physique flabby. When did you last eat a piece of fruit or take any exercise? This month? This year? Dreadful. Your kem can only be as healthy as you are. Pyon has to keep topping up because you give him so little to nourish him. His fur is poor, and his behaviour results from both bad diet and your disgusting attitude. I’ve seen you twice for less than five minutes at a time and most of that you’ve spent shouting at the poor creature. Do you have any idea how much that hurts them?”

He shoved the basket back at Julian. His beautiful kem gave his host’s face a lick and Ledbetter reached up and stroked the kem’s tail with reverent gentleness. “You, sir, are unworthy of the honour of hosting a kem. If you had a spit of decency, you’d pull yourself together and give Pyon a long and happy life. Instead you’ll indulge yourself until you drop dead at forty of a heart attack, and take him with you. Now good—“

Pyon chose that moment to rematerialise—and leap across to Ledbetter’s arm. He scrambled up until he suddenly saw Ledbetter’s kem—he scrambled down in panic. Julian had never seen him react like that to another kem before—was he afraid? He reached out to pick Pyon up, but then stopped because Ledbetter beat him to it.

“Hey, Pyon,” the man said in a low, gentle voice as he cupped Pyon’s bottom. “You’re safe, little fellow. Linis won’t hurt you, you know that. Yes, that’s right. Let me have a look at you. May I?”

Julian blinked at Ledbetter being so polite and formal with his kem, but the man ignored him, carefully lifting Pyon up. “Aren’t you handsome,” Ledbetter crooned, still keeping his voice very quiet, while Pyon gazed back adoringly. Ledbetter’s entire demeanour, his expression, had softened and became solicitous, kind—almost like a completely new person. He scratched behind Pyon’s ears and stroked the kem down his black-furred back and tail with one long sweep of his big hand. Pyon began to trill as he hardly ever did with Julian—and here he was, cuddling a complete stranger.

“Thank you, he’s mine,” Julian snapped, unaccountably jealous. “Pyon!”

Pyon jumped, startled, and dematerialised instantly. Julian’s hand tightened around the basket handle as he glared at Ledbetter. “Okay, you’ve said your piece.”

He didn’t trust himself to say another word, so he turned on his heel and walked off. He paid for the food and managed to scrape up enough politeness to nod at the shopkeeper, but then he stomped out, furious and even more humiliated than he’d felt that morning. He’d come that close to punching that man and he hadn’t felt like that since school! Unworthy of Pyon? Who the hell did he think he was!

The bus came almost at once and five minutes later he was letting himself in through his front door. As he tossed the food into the fridge, too angry to be hungry, Pyon appeared and sat on the countertop, looking expectant.

“See what you’ve done?” Julian snarled.

Pyon meeped and ran off—probably to make a little nest on the bed or with Julian’s clothes. Julian didn’t care. He flung himself onto his sofa and glared into space, his arms wrapped around himself. That pompous, supercilious, privileged prick! Pyon wasn’t ill, and neither was he!

He turned on the TV but it held no interest for him. He couldn't think of anything but those hurtful, vicious words and the completely false accusation of....

...cruelty.

Was he cruel? Everyone knew you couldn’t hurt a kem—they just dematerialised if they felt threatened. You didn’t have to feed them, they kind of absorbed what they needed from inside the host. Actually, no one knew much about them at all. Except Mr Perfect Hair And Trousers apparently.

He heard a quiet chirp and turned. Pyon sat on the end of the sofa, again looking wary.

“Oh come here, stupid, as if I’d hurt you.” Pyon squeaked and leapt into Julian’s arms, and Julian, for a few moments, just gave himself over to the pure pleasure of letting Pyon cuddle and lick him. He’d never do anything to hurt him—how could that bastard say that?

But when he sat up a little and Pyon curled up on his lap while Julian stroked him, he had to admit there was a huge difference between Pyon and Ledbetter’s kem—Linis, that was his name. Pyon and Linis. Pyon was small and scruffy and hyperactive. Linis was huge and sleek and apparently perpetually calm, even when his host was upset.

Kems were all different with different personalities. Everyone knew that. But Pyon’s fur did look rather...limp. And thin. Julian didn’t usually pay any attention to that because his kem was usually rushing around like a mad thing. But Julian wasn’t sick, so why was his kem?

Pyon made an enquiring little chirp and then dematerialised without the slightest warning. Was he hungry? Was Ledbetter right and Pyon needed more food—better food? But they didn’t eat.

He stood up and went to the fridge. That remark about the fruit had really stung because it was true—he didn’t like fruit or veg much, and tended not to buy it because it went off. His parents—his Mum, particularly—had always insisted on vegetables at supper and there was always fruit in their house. Julian just didn’t bother when it was him alone.

But maybe he needed to. He looked at his watch—yes, he had time if he used the tiny corner shop at the other end of the block.

Half an hour later, he looked at the wildly expensive packed salad and the even more expensive piece of steak he’d managed to get from the deli he’d never used, a few doors down. “You better appreciate this, Pyon,” he said, grimacing as he picked up a bit of green stuff. Yuck.

He didn’t have time for anything but his usual coffee and Danish before work, but he’d gone to bed early and slept a full nine hours. Pyon looked just the same but maybe he was a tiny bit less hysterical. He came back to Julian’s desk sooner than usual at least. It was hard to concentrate on him completely because Edward was slinking back and forth at intervals, and Julian kept tensing for another remark. He also wondered if Ledbetter would say something to the managers about Julian’s rudeness in the supermarket—he’d stepped over the line, he knew that and if Ledbetter complained, he’d have every right to.

But Edward kept his mouth shut, and Ledbetter didn’t appear. Pyon got up to no more than his usual nonsense and didn’t make anyone spill or ruin anything, so there were no frustrated telephone calls about his kem. In fact, it was an almost peaceful morning, though Julian was glad when one o’clock came around and he could get some lunch. He’d planned to go out and find something healthy, but it was raining and he lost the impetus. At least he didn’t expect to run into anyone difficult at the work canteen.

But once again he was out of luck because he spotted Ledbetter eating on his own—which was rather odd, since he was so senior in the office—in the corner of the canteen. Julian had three choices—head out for lunch, or eat in and ignore the man. Or he could do what he actually did, to his own surprise, which was to take his tray and head straight over to Ledbetter’s table. At least he got the small satisfaction of taking the man completely by surprise.

“I want to talk to you.”

“I'm eating my lunch.” Linis stared up at Julian with huge golden eyes that seemed to read his soul. Linis’ host was already busy looking back down at his meal, Julian dismissed from his attention and his thoughts.

Julian sat down and won a dark scowl. “Yes, I can see that.”

Pyon appeared just then and once again, Ledbetter’s stern expression softened. “Hello, Pyon.”

He reached out and petted him as Pyon skirted warily around Linis, almost on tiptoe with nervousness. The bigger kem didn’t move or react, just regarding Pyon with those big eyes and thinking his own kemmish thoughts.

Ledbetter glared at Julian. “I don’t want company.”

“Too bad. You like my kem, I come with him. I need to talk to you.”

Ledbetter ignored him and concentrated on his chicken salad, still petting and stroking Pyon who adored the attention. Julian could feel Ledbetter’s hostility, and yet he received these vague sensations of pleasure from the constant physical stimulation given to Pyon. It was confusing and irritating in the extreme, and didn’t make him any more diplomatic in his approach.

“I want your help,” he said.

The man didn’t look at him as he answered. “Whatever it is, I'm not interested.”

“It’s about Pyon.”

Ledbetter looked up, his eyes unfriendly. “If you’re about to utter more nonsense about making him behave, I swear, I'm going to put a complaint in about you.”

“I'm not! I want your help to...to help him. About what you said. My diet and stuff. I...I want to do the right thing—I ate a salad last night!” Then he flushed hot. He sounded so childish.

Even Ledbetter was mildly amused. “And yet you lived. How brave.”

“But I don’t know what’s the right thing for him! And how do you know this stuff?”

“I pay attention to Linis and all kems, which most people don’t bother about. If you listen, you learn. I doubt you have much experience at the technique.”

“God, you’re such a...such a....” Julian growled in frustration and Pyon squeaked in alarm. He hastily stroked his kem’s tail. “It’s not you, dummy.”

“Don’t call him that!”

Pyon squeaked again and ran up Julian’s arm. Julian shushed him gently and then glared at Lebetter. “Now who’s shouting and frightening him? It’s just an affectionate nickname.”

“So you like being called a dummy, do you? Is that your name? Mr Dummy?”

“It’s Julian and no, but a kem doesn’t understand the words.”

Ledbetter made a disgusted ‘tch’. “You have no idea how much more they understand—and more than that, they know your heart.”

“Then he knows I don’t mean anything by it. You’re not helping him by abusing me. I just want to know what I should be eating.” He shoved his tray across the table towards the man. “How does this look?”

Ledbetter glanced at it. “Sugar, sugar, fat, salt, flour, oh and look, more sugar and salt.” He poked with his fork at the chicken bun on the plate. “There might be some decent protein in there but I doubt it. If you want to die young, by all means, keep eating that.”

“Will you stop with the dying young thing? Why do you care anyway?”

“I don’t. I care about Pyon. All you care about is your massive and badly nourished ego. You want to know how to eat correctly? Look it up, I'm not an encyclopaedia.”

He went to stand and Julian’s cheeks burned in humiliation again. “You’re a hypocrite, though. If you cared for Pyon, you’d help. You’re the one with the massive ego. You just want to put me down and swan off, so sure you’re perfect in every way. Pyon and I can get stuffed so far as you’re concerned.”

Ledbetter’s long jaw worked and then he sat down again, glaring at Julian. “Are you serious or are you just trying to prove a point?”

“I'm serious. I...I don’t want to hurt him. I love him.” Pyon twined his tail around Julian’s arm and then stared up at him with his pretty green eyes. Julian realised it was true—he did love Pyon. He just...didn’t know the first thing about how to look after him. “And I don’t want him to die young either. So help me or shut up.”

Linis stood up and stalked slowly over to Ledbetter so he could lean up against his chest and be cuddled. The look of serenity that came over Ledbetter’s face was so strange—so beautiful, in a way. Julian suspected that no one and nothing in the world was as important to Ledbetter as Linis, which was completely freaky. He didn’t know anyone this involved with their kem at all.

On the other hand, Linis was very well-behaved and Ledbetter was a successful lawyer in perfect control of himself, so whatever he was doing, worked.

“Will you help?” Julian asked, somewhat more politely.

“Depends on how hard you want to work. It’s not just diet. You have to give full attention to your health and to Pyon. You can’t even organise yourself to do your ironing.”

Julian hastily pulled his jacket closed—he’d meant to do his ironing, he really had, but he’d been busy thinking about Pyon.... “I'm so tired when I get home from work, that’s all.”

“Yes. Because you eat rubbish, never exercise, don’t sleep enough and your leisure time is spent, what—watching TV? Playing on the computer? I bet it’s not spent with Pyon.”

“He plays on his own.”

“Yes, but he’d rather play with you.” Ledbetter sighed, and for the first time, almost looked human. “You don’t understand. No one does. Kems love their hosts. No other company is superior.” He looked down at Linis and a small smile crept onto his lips. “And no other company is superior to them.” He bent down and nuzzled the top of Linis’ tawny head. “They’re the perfect companion, and you’re all Pyon needs—or would be if you let it.”

“You make it sound like you don’t need other people in your life.”

“I don’t.” The coldness was back. “This isn’t about me. This is about you. Will you commit to working or not? I don’t have time to waste if you won’t.”

“I will. I want to do whatever it takes.”

“Then dispose of that trash, and fetch yourself water, a chicken salad and a wholemeal roll. No coffee, no butter. A big glass of water. Pyon will wait for you.”

Though stung more than a little by the haughty tone, Julian did exactly as ordered. When he returned and sat down, he opened his mouth to ask another question, but Ledbetter stopped him.

“No. Eat. Concentrate on that task alone. Enjoy the food, and then let Pyon enjoy it. Take your time—you have an hour. Use it.”

It was the strangest and most uncomfortable meal Julian had ever had, trying to concentrate on his food while three pairs of eyes watched him. He wouldn’t have thought eating a simple chicken salad—which wasn’t too bad, really, even with the vegetables—would have been so hard. His fingers seemed to have forgotten how to hold a fork, or how to break open a breadroll without making a mess. Ledbetter said nothing as he watched, stroking Linis and Pyon with the same careful attention as he’d shown to them before.

At last the damn food had gone. “Happy?” Julian asked as he put his fork down.

“It’s nothing to do with me...ah, see? He was hungry,” Ledbetter said when Pyon suddenly jumped up and into Julian’s chest. “And I bet he’ll stay out longer this time.”

“What does how I eat have to do with Pyon?” Julian was sure this guy was making fun of him.

Ledbetter regarded him coolly. “You wolf down your food and never taste it, so of course you don’t really enjoy it. You choose food that is easy and simple in flavour, which is digested too quickly and which leaves you hungry a short time later. Kems need the same things which make a person healthy—good quality protein, vegetables, complex carbohydrates, monosaturate fat—and water,” he said, pushing Julian’s glass at him. “And knock off the coffee—it’s very bad for you and for him.”

“I get headaches without it!”

“You get headaches because you’re addicted to the caffeine. It’s doing you no good, and not even keeping you awake. If you can’t cut it out immediately, cut down, and on the weekend, quit completely. Switch to tea, if you must. Kems are very sensitive to certain drugs and caffeine is one of the worst.”

“Okay,” Julian agreed reluctantly. It made sense—but he did love his coffee. “So I eat right and Pyon will be better?”

“It’s a start, but it’s not enough. You need a full eight hours’ sleep each night, and you need to exercise.”

“I don’t have time,” Julian said. “And gym memberships cost—”

Ledbetter made the ‘tch’ sound again. “How far do you live from work?”

“Uh...about two miles. I catch a bus.”

“Yes, which takes you about twenty minutes. Walk—it’ll take you very little longer. When you toughen up a bit you can start running.”

“Running! I’ve never done it—well, at school, but I was really crap—“

Ledbetter stood up quite suddenly. Linis leapt up onto his shoulders to stare down as disdainfully as his host. “You said you wanted to work, yet every suggestion I’ve made, you’ve whined about. I don’t have time for this. I pity your kem deeply—but you’re a waste of oxygen. Good day.”

Julian’s mouth, which had been hanging open, snapped shut as Ledbetter walked away, long back stiff and straight, Linis draped around his shoulders. “What the...?”

He thought they’d been having a conversation, and then.... That guy had the social skills of a lizard.

Damn it and he was late. He’d done nothing but be chewed out and eat a salad for a whole bloody hour.

Pyon appeared at his desk while Julian distractedly checked what new files had arrived. He looked just the same—cheerful, scruffy and irresponsible. Adorable. Julian scratched under his chin and then picked him up. “Can I really help you, Pyon?”

Pyon chirped and cuddled close. Julian rubbed his face on the top of Pyon’s soft-furred head and wondered if he could do this—with or without the arrogant Mr Ledbetter’s help. He just had no idea where to start.

He had to get healthy. A health food store? There was one not far from the office, so he dropped in there after work.

That turned out to be one of his less clever ideas—not only did Pyon go berserk (after being unusually quiet that afternoon, which had lulled Julian into a false sense of security) but in between chasing after him and apologising furiously, Julian couldn’t find anything that looked like real food at all among the shelves and shelves of dried up, brown and unappealing things that he couldn't begin to name, or the jars and cans and cartons of mysterious, insanely expensive pills and powders making elaborate claims that frankly he found incredible. All the books were either about losing weight or becoming a muscleman. Not a single one was about looking after kems—or just becoming a normal healthy person. Healthier, he told himself. He wasn’t sick. Pyon was, and that was enough.

Thinking of Ledbetter’s scorn, he ignored the bus stop and began the long walk home—but quickly realised his office shoes were just not suitable for this. Damn it! He needed shoes, and good food, and a book on what to eat, or something! All of which meant going into the centre of town to the main shops—and Pyon was already up to mischief. Of course his kem reappeared just as he pondered all this. “Can’t you just...stay inside while I shop? Please?”

Pyon chirped, licked his chin and then disappeared. Julian blinked. Was that all he had to do? Ask nicely?

“Pyon?”

His kem’s little head popped out of his chest, eyes alert, waiting for Julian to tell him what he wanted. “You’re a good boy, Pyon,” Julian said—for the first time in his life—and Pyon trilled with delight. Julian patted him. “Now, you stay in there while I sort this out. It’ll take about an hour.” And damned if Pyon didn’t actually seem to be listening. Why hadn’t it occurred to him to just ask before?

The excursion took a bit more than an hour but at the end he had a new pair of trainers, a sack full of vegetables, fish and other expensive necessities, and a book on healthy eating. By then he was just too footsore to contemplate the walk back, so he read his book on the bus home, and almost missed his stop, he was so engrossed. Only as he put his key in the lock did he remember that Pyon was probably waiting for permission to come out again.

“Pyon?’

His kem bounced out joyfully and leapt onto his shoulder so he could lick Julian’s ear and cuddle up to his hair.

“Wow, you missed me. I'm sorry, little fella.”

Ledbetter seemed to be right about that too—all Pyon really wanted from him was love and attention. And manners.

Supper was grilled turkey, stir-fried vegetables and brown rice. He realised that he’d have to invest in more cooking utensils and probably some cookbooks too. The food sat well on his stomach, though, and Pyon was quiet and no more than pleasantly playful. Score another point to Ledbetter and his strange obsession with kems.

Filled with good intentions, he spent the evening cleaning the apartment, did his laundry and ironing, and sorted out his food stores. Then he made a list of what he needed to buy when he went grocery shopping next. Pyon took a great interest in that, perhaps somehow working out it was to benefit him, sniffing at the list and even licking it at one point.

“Hey, that’s not good nutrition. Paper’s not listed in the book!” Pyon chirped, walked over on top of the list and then lay down on his back, paws wagging. “I see—that’s a hint, is it?”

Julian ruffled Pyon’s tummy fur and grinned at the inane look of pleasure on his kem’s face. He couldn’t remember the last time Pyon had felt like such good company. Was this all it took? Some attention, some decent food? All these years of complaining about his annoying kem and the answer was this simple?

He looked up more information about diet and food on line and then at ten took himself firmly to bed. Pyon curled up on his head but Julian didn’t complain this time. It felt kind of nice, actually.

The walk to work in new shoes nearly killed him, especially as he’d foregone his breakfast coffee and had a vicious headache as a result. But Pyon loved it, popping out to run around and explore with little squeaks and chirps of pleasure, and Julian had to admit it made a pleasant change from staring down someone’s cleavage or at the spots on the back of their neck for twenty minutes. He’d overestimated the time it would take to make the trip so he arrived ten minutes early—the first time ever—and Carole looked about ready to faint with shock as Julian walked in.

“Coming in early to fix up a mess?”

“No, I just felt like walking,” Julian said airily, giving her a grin and sauntering casually down the hall. Pyon sat sedately on his shoulder the whole time, though he ran off as soon as Julian got to his desk.

There Julian could take the new trainers off and massage his aching feet. He was supposed to walk home too—it’d kill him. But he felt good—sweaty, but good. The headache was pretty fierce, though. He reached for his desk drawer where he kept the aspirin, but then stopped—Ledbetter had said kems were sensitive to drugs. Was aspirin one of them? He wished he could just email the sod and ask him but he’d rather gnaw his arm off at the elbow than face that man again. He shut the drawer and squinted against the headache as best he could.

Being healthy took a lot of work. He had to think about eating, instead of just grabbing stuff. He had to make time to do more shopping, and go to more places than the one store he’d been using. He had to spend more time cooking, and then cleaning up instead of just throwing containers away. And the walking was tough at first, though after ten days, he found it a lot easier. But the change in Pyon was nothing short of a miracle—people in the office started to notice after the third day. A week later, and Julian could see the change in Pyon’s fur as well as his behaviour. It made him so ashamed that he’d let his kem suffer all these years for the want of so little, but Pyon didn’t hold a grudge, or care. He was happy and healthy and that made Julian ridiculously happy too.

He’d seen Ledbetter at a distance a couple of times, but always made himself scarce, memories of that icy flaying far too fresh for him to want to invite a repeat. He hadn’t seen him again in the canteen—perhaps Ledbetter was avoiding him too, or maybe it had just been a one off, since the senior staff didn’t eat there much. Whatever the reason, Julian was glad not to have had another bruising encounter with the man.

Julian promised himself over this weekend, he would look into buying a set of weights, and maybe even a gym membership, though he didn’t like the idea much. The problem was, he’d never been particularly sporty, and neither were his friends, most of whom were computer nerds and gamers. Julian didn’t really have a competitive bone in his body. All he’d ever wanted was an easy life. He was saving to travel and that was his long-term goal, but right now, he just wanted to work and live without any hassle. His mother fretted about him getting married. Telling her he was gay would lead to hassle, so he hadn’t. Fortunately, he only saw them every couple of months, and his brother was getting married at the end of the year, so that took the attention off him. With any luck, he’d have saved enough to travel before he had to have another uncomfortable conversation about the girlfriends he didn’t have.

The canteen was a bit of a challenge food-wise, but going out at lunchtime meant jostling with hundreds of other workers for the few takeaways around the office and the food wasn’t worth the effort. But by now he had it worked out, and his lunch was as healthy as he could reasonably make it. Pyon perched on his shoulder and peered over to supervise Julian selecting low fat milk, a salad without too much dressing, chicken breast, wholegrain bread, and a tangerine. Adding fruit was something he still had to think about, but he’d rediscovered his childhood love of oranges and bananas, and he’d already noticed how much Pyon seemed to appreciate the change in his diet.

He knew when he’d got it right because Pyon would sit at his desk after lunch, trilling quietly for hours and hours, letting Julian pet him, and never running off or dematerialising. Every day it seemed, someone had to stop and do a double-take at the sight of the former pest, behaving so politely. Edward had made a bitchy remark about drugs, but had walked off when Julian sweetly asked if that was his secret too. Bastard.

He’d timed the meal to miss the first lunchtime rush, but it was still busy, and noisy with the crash of cutlery against china, and people raising the voices to be heard against the din. He paid and took his tray, looking around for a place...oh. Ledbetter was there in the corner again. Alone, again.

Pyon meeped quietly in Julian’s ear, and that made him decide to face the music. If nothing else, he owed Ledbetter for Pyon’s improvement and if the guy told him to buzz off, then...well, he’d have done the honourable thing. Feeling morally superior and fit would be great.

Ledbetter jerked up as Julian sat down—he hadn’t noticed him approach at all. “Excuse me,” he said coldly, going to stand.

“Forty-three,” Julian said quickly.

“I beg your pardon?”

“Forty-three. Miles. That’s how many I’ve walked since I saw you last.”

Ledbetter looked completely bewildered, his anger swamped by confusion. “What are you talking about?”

“Walking. You said, eat better, walk more, sleep more. Well, I did. And now look at him. Pyon? Come out, let him look at you.”

Pyon, who’d ducked up behind Julian’s neck as soon as he’d spotted Linis, crept out onto his shoulder. “That’s it. Come down and let Zack look at you.”

“My name is not ‘Zack’, thank you. Mr Ledbetter to the assistants, in any event.” But then his expression softened. “Oh, Pyon, you’re looking very fine. That’s it, come here.”

He sat down and put his hand out, palm up, and Pyon walked down Julian’s arm and across the table. He meeped a little when he saw Linis staring, but Ledbetter crooned encouragement, and soon Pyon sat on his hand, trilling away as Ledbetter stroked his fur.

“Hmmm, he does look somewhat better.”

“And he’s much quieter.”

“Well, of course. It’s not magic. So you just came over here to boast?”

Pyon sat up at Ledbetter’s changed tone and looked back over his shoulder at Julian. Julian put out his hand and his kem came back to him, looking for a cuddle which Julian readily gave him. “Sort of. “ Ledbetter snorted. “No, wait. I...you were right and I was rude. I wanted to show you I was prepared to work. I bought shoes and a wok and everything. I'm going to look for a gym tomorrow.”

“Waste of time and money—it’s boring, Pyon will loathe it, and all you’ll do is put on muscle and look like an idiot. Running is the best thing. Kems love it—getting out in the fresh air, seeing new things. I'm sure it’s more effort than you’re prepared to go to, though.”

“It’s not! I just...have no idea about how to do it. I just remember school and hating it...and....” He fell quiet, aware he was whining again. “If you think it’s best, I’ll do it. I can find a book, I suppose.” Ledbetter said nothing. “Okay, well...I thought you’d be pleased to see how Pyon was doing.” He stood up and picked up his tray—Pyon scrambled up his jacket and up onto his shoulder again. “Thanks for your help.”

He turned, cheeks hot with embarrassment. He shouldn’t have bothered. Pyon licked his ear and squeaked softly. Julian balanced the tray on one hand and reached up with the other to pet his kem. “Don’t worry about it. How about we go for a really long walk somewhere tomorrow? I’ll catch a train out to the country park and we can get out in the sun. You’d like that.” Pyon squeaked again, more excitedly.

“Julian?”

He stopped, then turned. Zachary Ledbetter stood there, his hands clasped together. “If you’re serious, meet me in Twyford Park by the cattle statue at five am tomorrow.”

“F-five?” Ledbetter’s expression turned stony. “Uh...it’s just—it’s still dark. Do I need a torch or anything?”

“It’s not dark and no. Bring proper running shoes and a bottle of water and wear shorts. I won’t wait for you.”

“Okay.”

Ledbetter swept off, but Linis turned to watch the two of them with his unblinking golden eyes all the way until Ledbetter was lost from sight.

Julian stood frozen until someone bumped him, then he hastily moved back to Ledbetter’s vacated table. Five in the morning? The man was crazy. And what were proper running shoes? Did his trainers count?

Apparently not, as a trip to the shoe store proved. Julian walked out richer for a pair of hi-tech running shoes and lighter by a lot more money than he’d expected to spend on any item of clothing. He had to spend more money at the sports clothing store as well, since he didn’t own shorts or sport socks or the headband and wrist bands the assistant assured him were essential, as was a strange waterbottle with handle he was apparently supposed to carry in his hand.

He tried everything on at home and felt like a complete prat. Pyon thought the wrist bands were toys and played with them all evening, chasing them all over the floor. Julian didn’t have the heart to stop him. Tomorrow would be awful. And Ledbetter would laugh at him, no question about it.

He really, really didn’t want to wake up, and Pyon didn’t appreciate it either, his plaintive high whine following Julian around as he stumbled about and got dressed in his new, ridiculous clothes. The park was only a quarter of a mile from his apartment—he walked as fast as he could, hoping to somehow miraculous become fit enough to keep up with the sleek Mr Ledbetter, and also to warm up because it was damn chilly. And it was dark, although by the time he reached the park, dawn was just starting. The air smelled moist and leafy, and traffic noises didn’t sully the park’s quietness. Lovely, he had to admit. But getting up at this hour just to see it? Not worth it.

Ledbetter was there by the statue, making a torturous looking movement with his body Julian really hoped the man didn’t expect him to copy. The guy had the longest legs...and those high cut shorts left nothing to the imagination. Really nice arse too. Pity he was very obviously straight—but he was well out of Julian’s class anyway. Also—a bastard. An important consideration, that.

Ledbetter stood up and seemed surprised to see Julian. “Oh. You came.”

“Of course I did. Where’s Linis?”

“Inside. He’s still resting. Pyon?”

“Sulking. He didn’t like getting up so early.”

Ledbetter smiled briefly, teeth flashing white in the dim light. “No, kems aren’t really morning creatures. But this is the best time for a run.”

“I really haven’t done this for over ten years. I don’t want you pitching a fit at me for not keeping up.”

“I’ve taken account of that in my plans for this morning, don’t worry. Let me look at your gear.”

Julian blinked in shock, until he realised the man meant his shoes and things. Ledbetter wasn’t entirely happy with the shoes but said they’d do for now.

“They were expensive!” Julian protested.

“Yes,” Ledbetter said, packing quite a lot of derision into a single word and one suggestive sniff. “That doesn’t mean they’re any good. But you won’t be pushing them too hard today so I won’t ask you to change them.”

Julian bristled. “I can’t afford to change my shoes to suit you.”

“You won’t. You’ll change them to suit you. Now stop talking and listen. We start with a warm up.”

Julian remembered now why he’d hated running at school. And sports. And PE of any kind. It made him look like a dork with a capital ‘duh’. It didn’t help that all the stretches and deep bends and arm raises and lunges which perfectly emphasised his pudgy out-of-shapedness, only served to demonstrate the length and strength and...well, classical beauty of Ledbetter’s body. If the man had been the least bit aware of his own physical perfection, it would have been completely obnoxious. Instead, it was merely annoying. A lot, actually, but he’d survive. Julian wasn’t out here to compare himself to Mr Perfect. He was out here because it was good for him and thus good for Pyon.

The exercise exhausted him—and they hadn’t even done any running. As he stood panting and wondering if it was too late to back out, Ledbetter took off his watch. “Put this on,” he ordered, holding it out.

“I already have a watch.”

“It’s not a watch, it’s a heart rate monitor. Put it on.”

Perplexed, Julian obeyed and then Ledbetter asked, “How old are you?”

Julian raised his eyebrows in frank disbelief. “I beg your pardon?”

The man looked annoyed as he repeated, “How old are you?”

“Twenty-six but what—“

“Then if that,” he pointed to the monitor, “indicates your heart rate is above one-fifty-five at any point, slow down until it slows down. Your safe maximum heart rate is determined by your age.”

“But won’t you need it?”

Ledbetter flashed a quick smile. “We won’t be running hard enough to tax me this morning. Ready? You should call Pyon—he’ll enjoy this. Linis? Come on, you love this bit.”

Linis appeared and jumped down to the ground a little ahead of them, looking expectant. When Julian summoned Pyon, his kem still seemed put out. Julian gave him a cuddle and set him on the ground. Pyon scurried around behind him to get away from Linis.

“I don’t understand why he does that,” Julian said, confused by the strange reaction.

“Sometimes it takes a while for them to make friends. Don’t worry. Now, let’s go. We’ll take it easy, and you watch your heart rate.”

As exercise for his body, it wasn’t much of a success. As an exercise in humiliation, it was perfect. He managed to run for all of thirty seconds before he stopped, out of breath. He expected Ledbetter to yell at him, but the man just told him to walk until he felt able to run again. The next burst was even shorter. In the end, he managed a mere fifteen minutes before he called for mercy, and his face was hot from embarrassment as much as exertion.

His heart pounded, his pulse throbbing in his forehead like he was about to burst something. He gulped down air into a dry throat, holding onto a tree to support himself, sipping water before he could speak. “Even I know...that’s pathetic,” he gasped out to forestall the sarcasm.

“It’s pretty much what I expected,” Ledbetter said. “You’ll do better next time. You need to cool down with more exercises.”

“Next time? Tomorrow?”

“No. We’ll talk about this. Come on—you need to do this, and then you can wait while I do a proper run.”

More bending and stretching and embarrassing postures, with Ledbetter simply demonstrating before Julian did as he asked.

Finally, he was allowed to sit on a bench. Ledbetter hadn’t even broken into a sweat. By now it had warmed up slightly but Julian was dripping wet and the gentle breeze was cold. Ledbetter tsked at him not having a sweater to wear. “Sit there, drink some more water, play with Pyon. I’ll be twenty minutes. Can I have my monitor back?”

Wearily Julian stripped the thing from his wrist and handed it over. Ledbetter put it on, pressed a button and then headed off. Julian was too tired to raise more than a flicker of admiration for the way the perfect arse moved as Ledbetter ran.

Pyon appeared from wherever he’d been exploring—he’d run along with them, keeping pace easily, and really had seemed to enjoy it. Now he was looking for cuddles and that being all Julian was up for, he was glad to comply. Pyon’s fur felt good against his chilled skin. His kem was fascinated by his sweat and general condition, needing to sniff and lick just about everywhere before he’d settle down around Julian’s shoulders. That felt nice. And sitting here in the quiet, watching the brightening sky through the trees, was kind of pretty.

Actually, now he’d got his breath back, he didn’t feel too bad. Almost like he could do a little more running, but he thought he better not push his luck. It was nice here, the clean morning air sweet and cool, the birds and bugs and flowers a nice change from his apartment. He’d come here a few times, but never this early. If Ledbetter said this was what he had to do to get fit, well...it wasn’t so bad.

He saw Linis before he saw Ledbetter, the tawny kem bounding along with his big fluffy tail erect and cheerful above him. Pyon meeped anxiously when he saw him, but he didn’t run away, and actually came to sit in Julian’s lap to wait for Ledbetter to stop and then do the same set of exercises as Julian had. Now the man was sweaty, but grinning—he’d enjoyed himself.

“Come on, I want to walk back before I get cold. Next time, bring something you can wrap around your waist.”

Julian fell into step, their kems walking ahead of them, carefully apart with tails erect. “So when is next time?”

“You’ll be sore tomorrow—you’ll need to take it easy. Go for a long, gentle walk—definitely no running. If you’re feeling better on Monday, then you can jog again.”

“At five o'clock? Before work?”

Ledbetter didn’t answer. Julian glanced at him. There was a distinctly guilty expression on those elegant features.

“Well...on that point. You don’t actually have to get up at five.”

Julian stopped so he could glare properly. “No? So what are we doing up at this ridiculous hour?” It wasn’t even six yet!

“I...uh...wanted to see if you were serious.”

“Mr Ledbetter, you’re a prick.”

To his surprise, the man only grinned. “Yes, I suppose I am. But you turned up, and that impressed me.”

“So, what, do I get a medal? You’ll stop being so nasty to me?”

“I'm never nasty. I tell people uncomfortable truths. They don’t care for it much.”

“Especially when you’re so snotty about it.”

Ledbetter’s smile slipped. “You know what to do now. You should buy a better pair of shoes of that brand I mentioned, and a heart rate monitor. There’s a club who run in the park. If you join them, you’ll get a lot of advice. I need a shower. Good day.”

Julian caught his arm. “Wait! Are you angry with me?”

The man’s eyes were shuttered, revealing nothing. “I’ve done what’s necessary, you’ve demonstrated a commitment to good health and Pyon has already benefited. There’s little more I can add. I see no reason to detain you further.”

“But....” Julian frowned in perplexity. “Why don’t you have breakfast with me? My apartment’s just around the—“

“No, I don’t think—“

“Or there’s a coffee shop that does healthy stuff—I checked. Come on, you can’t tell me you’ve got something more important to do at six am.”

“No.” But the man still looked as if he wanted to bolt. “I need a shower and the café won’t be open....” He stopped and smiled suddenly, confusing Julian completely. “See? Told you they’d be friends eventually.”

Julian looked down and ahead. “Oh. Oh!” Pyon was licking Linis who sat sedately as he was groomed, looking as if it was merely his due. Pyon’s eyes were half-shut in apparent ecstasy. “See? If you go home now, poor Linis and poor Pyon.... Come back to my place. It’s tidy, I swear and I’ve got all the healthy stuff you could want.”

“I...I really don’t think it’s appropriate. You’re an assistant.”

Julian gritted his teeth. “And you’re a snob. Pyon, come on—we’re not good enough for his highness, apparently.”

Pyon bounced over, looked at Julian and then Ledbetter, and meeped as if distressed. “It’s okay,” Julian said more gently, picking him up. “Come on, let’s go home and eat.”

He started to walk away, but stopped when he heard a very faint, “W-wait.” He took another step. “Please?”

He turned. Ledbetter held Linis in his arms, but though his kem was calm and unruffled, the host was not. “I...that was rude of me. I didn’t mean...it’s not that you’re not good enough...I....”

“It’s only breakfast.”

“I’ve never done that before.”

“Breakfast?”

“Not...uh...not socially.”

“Oh. Well, I’ve never been jogging before, so we’re even, right? If you don’t come, then I’ll be at a disadvantage and that would be rude.”

“It would?”

“Oh yes,” Julian said, tucking Pyon up onto his shoulder and coming back to grab Ledbetter’s arm.

But the bloody man still resisted. “I don’t even know your surname.”

Crap, this guy was uptight. Julian stuck out his hand. “Julian Godwin, nice to meet you.”

Hesitantly, the man accepted his gesture with his own big, long-fingered hand. “Uh, Zachary Ledbetter, same.” He shook Julian’s hand briefly then let go.

“And never Zach, right?”

“Absolutely not.”

Julian grinned at his distaste. “Well, Zachary, how do you feel about poached eggs and wholemeal toast?”

Ledbetter—Zachary—smiled rather shyly. “That sounds lovely.”

They stopped at Zachary’s apartment—and how strange that he lived so close—so he could pick up a tracksuit to throw over his sweaty clothes. Julian would have been happy to wait for him to shower but the man seemed rather reluctant for anyone to come into his private domain, so he didn’t push. It was a big enough victory getting him to agree to breakfast, after all. A short walk after that and they came to Julian’s somewhat less swish apartment block. At least he’d cleaned up the night before.

“It’s not as posh as yours, I'm sure,” he said, letting them into the apartment. “How long have you been there?”

“Not quite a month. I only moved to the city recently. I wanted a place by the park and the agent found it for me.”

“You own it?”

“Of course.”

Julian shook his head in amazement—the man didn’t look that much older than him, but he was already out of the rent trap. “Go sit. Tea? How many eggs?”

If it hadn’t been for Pyon’s sudden infatuation with Linis, Julian thought that Zachary would have run after a single cup of tea. That he found the situation uncomfortable, was painfully obvious. But Pyon could be damn cute when he wanted to be, and he turned on the charm, enchanting Zachary and his kem both, pouncing from behind Julian’s arm, begging for a petting with little mewls, and chasing a ball of paper around the floor and finally curling around the thing as if it was an egg he was trying to hatch. Then he jumped back onto the table and demanded praise for his cleverness, which Zachary was happy to give him.

Julian watched from the kitchen and grinned at Pyon grooming and teasing the sedate and regal Linis, winning a lick or two in the process and a lot of petting from Zachary. The man seemed to be unaware of the effect he had on Julian when he did that, and in the circumstances, Julian wouldn’t mention it. It didn’t seem the right time to bring it up.

Breakfast was probably the easiest meal he could have offered, and eggs were one of the few things Julian already knew how to cook. They were both starving, so he served a stack of food—toast, poached eggs, melon slices and milk—which seemed to pass Zachary’s exacting standards. Zachary didn’t talk as he ate, but once he was onto his second cup of green tea, he relaxed a little. Julian felt he could ask him more about jogging, and how breakfast fitted in around that. He learned Zachary ran every day, usually in the morning, but never to work.

“What about when it’s wet or cold?”

“I can still run. If it’s truly vile, I use my building’s gym but Linis hates it.” He scratched between his kem’s ears. Linis yawned delicately, and lying beside him, almost on top of him, Pyon made a chirp as if he wanted petting too. Julian stroked his tail and resisted telling his kem not to be a greedy little sod. Pyon was almost drunk from all the affection he’d received this morning. Julian had a suspicion that his kem might even go home with Zachary if the man asked him politely enough—which he better not.

“You know a lot about kems. Everyone else just takes them for granted.”

Zachary winced, and Linis, apparently sensing his changed mood, moved closer and butted his head up against Zachary’s chest. Zachary picked him up and cuddled him close while Pyon pawed lazily at Linis’ tail. “It’s disgusting. Kems are as reliant on us as a child, and no one would treat a child with such disdain. Just because they can’t talk, doesn’t mean they’re dumb—or stupid. We know so little about them, and yet we feel free to dismiss them as nothing but extensions of our egos.”

“No one knows what they are—or where they came from. Or where they go when we die either.”

“They die.” Zachary’s green eyes were full of dark sorrow now and he rubbed his cheek against Linis’ head. “I know people like to think they’re reincarnated or they go off somewhere...but I think they die, like we do. So we have to give them as much time as we can.”

Pyon meeped and ran back to Julian for reassurance at Zachary’s harsh tone. “Hey,” Julian said as he took his kem into his arms. “Don’t get upset.”

“I can’t...I just can’t help it. The beautiful kems I’ve known who’ve died too soon because of utter selfishness of their hosts. Creatures with hearts and souls more pure than any human, lost because of idiocy.”

Well this was taking a turn for the worse, Julian thought. The man looked about to burst into tears. “Lots of people die young through no fault of their own, you know.”

“And lots of people pay no attention to the fact they’re responsible for another living creature and behave as if they can do exactly as they want. Their poor kems have no choice in the matter. I would never grieve for a human the way I have for those lost souls.”

“You might. If you loved them. If your parents died, you would.”

Zachary’s eyes turned from grief-stricken to icy disdain in a flash. “No, I wouldn’t.”

“Oh. Sorry. You don’t get on with them?”

The man looked away. Obviously a touchy point.

Julian decided to drop the subject. “Um...more tea?”

Heavy silence persisted for some time, Zachary stroking Linis with an absent expression, while Julian cleared up and discreetly comforted Pyon, who clearly knew something was wrong but just as obviously had no idea what.

Julian made a fresh pot of tea and then nudged Pyon across the table back to his new friends. Zachary roused as Pyon climbed his arm up to his shoulder and meeped in his ear. “Oh, hello—are you feeling neglected? Linis, manners.”

His kem stretched and yawned, and then climbed up Zachary’s arm to sit on his other shoulder. Julian grinned at the sight of the two kems bookending Zachary’s head. “You’ve won him right over.”

“I did nothing. Linis is the one with all the charm. Not that Pyon isn’t charming too,” he added, reaching up and scratching Pyon’s tummy. Pyon squirmed with delight and tried to burrow into Zachary’s hair, his fluffy tail swatting the man in the face as he wriggled about. Zachary didn’t seem to mind the indignity in the least—and yet if a person had taken that kind of liberty....

“He’s like another creature altogether. I wish I’d met you years ago.” Julian stopped, embarrassed, as he realised how that sounded.

Zachary didn’t seem to notice. “I didn’t live here years ago, so you couldn’t have. At least you’ve started well. Just don’t become slack because it seems easier. You owe it to him.”

“I know. I won’t.”

“Good.” He glanced at his watch. “It’s eight o’clock and I’ve imposed long enough. I should go home and change. Thank you for breakfast...it was...pleasant.”

“Surprised at that?”

“Yes. I...yes.” He smiled a little shyly. “I...don’t know anyone here.”

“Now you know two of us. Hey, I’ve got an idea. You said I’d be too sore to jog—but I promised Pyon I’d take him out to the country tomorrow, by train. Want to come? If you don’t know the area, then you could—“

“Uh...actually, I'm busy.”

It was said too fast for it to be the truth, or the whole truth, but Julian tried not to be offended. “Oh. Oh, right. Yes. Well, maybe next weekend or something. There’s a big country park about forty miles from here. You can get there by train. I keep meaning to go there when the weather’s good but I never get around to it. You’d like it.” He shut up—he was babbling.

“I’m sure I would.” Zachary stood up. “I...uh...I might be able to rearrange things. When will you be going?”

“In the morning sometime? You could drop over and let me know after you go for a jog. Ring the bell or something and tell me. I can wait.” Damn it, he could just give the guy his telephone number, but he had a feeling that would just send Zachary running for the hills.

“All right. I, uh...thank you for the invitation. And breakfast.”

“Thank you for the torture.”

Zachary grinned a little. “It’s fun.”

“I bet. Let me walk you out.”

Pyon rode on Zachary’s shoulder all the way down to the street, and only very reluctantly climbed back onto Julian at Zachary’s urging.

“See you tomorrow, maybe?” Julian said.

“Yes. Maybe. Thank you.” Zachary hurried away from him as if his arse was on fire.

Julian was now convinced that the guy’s problem wasn’t that he was a terrible snob but that he was terribly shy. Which, wow, if Julian looked like that and had his advantages? Would really not be a problem.

He turned to go back into the building. Pyon squeaked and then dematerialised—hungry, Julian guessed. It had been a long morning and it was still earlier than he would normally get up on the weekend.

An engine revved and he heard a horrible squeal of tyres. Bloody traffic morons. That was the worst part of living on this—

Then came a screech, and a dull, glassless thud. A second later a woman screamed.

Not a fender-bender. The car had hit a person, not another vehicle. And the woman screamed again, this time for help.

Zachary!

He pelted down the street, desperately hoping he was wrong, that he hadn’t just heard—

Near the corner crossing, Zachary lay in the street, bloodied and horribly broken and not at all alive. Already people were clustered around, one crouched at Zachary’s side. A car was stopped a little across the intersection, the driver surrounded by other people.

Julian paid him them no attention as he dropped to his knees beside the too still body. “Somebody, call a bloody ambulance!” he yelled, staring desperately up at the sea of faces. “Call an ambulance!”

They wouldn’t let him ride with Zachary to hospital but a nice woman gave him a lift in her car, following the ambulance as closely as possible, and offering words of comfort that Julian barely heard. His hands were covered in Zachary’s blood—a passing nurse had stopped to offer assistance, and Julian had done what he could using his own workplace first aid training, which wasn’t much. Identifying himself as the victim’s friend meant the paramedics asked him a lot of questions he had no idea of the answers for, then the police wanted more information. He could help them a little more since they wanted to know where Zachary lived and why he’d been on the street. But once Zachary had been loaded into the ambulance, Julian insisted on being allowed to go with him. The police let him leave—he wasn’t a witness, and there were plenty of other people who’d seen the accident who could help instead.

“Are you going to be all right, love?” the kind woman asked as she let him out at Emergency. “You look very pale.”

“I...uh...just need to know how he is.”

“Then you go find out. Good luck—and remember, people can survive much worse things.”

He watched her for a second or two as she drove away. Yes, people could survive worse. But they died in car accidents all the time, and Zachary had looked very bad. It had taken the paramedics a long time to stabilise him before they could load him up.

His bloodied state raised a few questions at reception but when they found out he wasn’t injured, he was told to wait with all the unfortunate friends and relatives of people being treated. The receptionist suggested that Mr Ledbetter’s family be contacted if Julian knew how to—but he didn’t. That ended his usefulness, apparently.

It became clear this would take more than a couple of hours, and his filthy state had already drawn a lot of curious looks. He took himself off to the small public bathroom to clean himself up. The place smelled like urine and unpleasant chemicals, and wasn’t particularly sterile. The soap dispenser was nearly empty and he had to use half a dozen paper towels before he removed the worst of the blood from his clothes and hands.

Pyon, who’d been so very good and kept himself out of sight while the worst was happening, now popped up and wanted reassuring.

“You and me both, little guy,” Julian said cuddling his kem, staring at his reflection in the mirror and wondering if Zachary was already dead. And Linis too. His eyes filled suddenly. No. No, not Linis too. Not both of them. He’d only just stopped hating the guy.

The waiting room was no one’s idea of a pleasant place to be. The television showed cartoons and then a series of inane soaps. Some of the waiting people stared at it slack-jawed, but most ignored it. There wasn’t much else to occupy the attention, and the bored wandered in and out to make mobile phone calls, smoke or just get out of the foetid, sickly air inside. Julian didn’t dare leave in case someone called him to tell him about Zachary.

It was two o’clock in the afternoon before he got any news at all, and that was only to tell him that he couldn’t have any specific information because he wasn’t a relative. “I don’t care—I want to stay here until he’s okay,” he told the doctor.

“That’s going to be some time,” she said. “Mr Ledbetter’s uncle is flying in tonight and there will be some decisions about treatment to be made. You can’t do anything for him right now. Mr Ledbetter is unconscious and will remain so for at least twenty-four hours—no visitors either.”

“I'm staying.”

She sighed. “Up to you. But if you want my advice, you’ll go home, change, get some rest and come back tomorrow.”

“What about his kem? Is Linis okay?”

“Kems typically dematerialise when the host is injured. We haven’t seen his but that’s not unusual. You surely know they can’t be injured. Now, please, I have other people to see.”

He stood disconsolately as she walked away. Pyon meeped enquiringly and rubbed his face against Julian’s cheek. She was right—he did need to change and eat, at least for Pyon’s sake. But he’d come back here afterwards.

He left a message at the office to tell them briefly what had happened—he had no idea when it would be picked up, but he didn’t care particularly since work was the last thing on his mind. Two messages on his own phone from friends, he ignored—they'd have to wait. He could email them later but he just couldn't deal with anything else now. Then he showered and changed, and ate a proper meal, and told Pyon to go inside so he could nourish himself properly. He felt fairly useless—he didn’t know Zachary’s family or friends so couldn’t tell them. The only thing he could do was swing past the man’s apartment building and let his neighbours know, but he discovered none of them had actually met Zachary. He delivered the information, hoped he wasn’t setting Zachary up to be burgled, and then he hailed a taxi and headed back to the hospital.

No change, no more information. Pyon didn’t like the hospital—neither did the other kems, from what he could see. Too many people in distress, angry, worried or bored, and no interest in playing with their kems or anyone else’s. Only the children, with their tiny symbiotes, had time for them. Pyon played a little with the younger kems and the children too, who adored him, but most of the time, he spent with Julian, curled up on his lap and swishing his tail against Julian’s hand, or begging for cuddles and petting. He seemed as worried as Julian, and it made Julian wonder just how much Pyon knew of what was going on.

The room was hot, ugly and smelled of desperation and unwashed people. Without his kem for company, he’d have gone nuts, but it was still damn boring. The only thing he’d learned was that Zachary’s uncle was expected in around midnight, still hours away. In the meantime, he could only wait and worry—or go home, which he refused to do. He felt someone should be here—it was wrong that Zachary, or anyone, could be so badly injured with no one to wait for them to wake up. But there wasn’t a lot he could do until that happened.

At eight, his stomach rumbled. He’d brought some nuts and dried fruit to stave off hunger but he thought he should keep those until he had no other options. The hospital offered a canteen some distance away, an all night tea and coffee bar, and some hideously overpriced vending machines. He went for the machines because they were closest and at least they sold sandwiches and juice. Zachary’s lectures about healthy eating hadn’t covered hospitals, but Julian felt he should try to stick to the diet. Zachary would be furious if Pyon suffered because of him.

He had just pressed the button for the juice and was waiting for it to dispense when he heard a plaintive whine and felt a clawing at his leg. But Pyon was on his shoulder.... He looked down and saw a familiar, if unexpected, kem, batting at his ankle. “Linis? What are you doing here?”

He bent down and picked up the big kem, who wailed and headbutted him. He’d never seen Linis upset at all before.

“Hey, fella, you’re worried?” He cuddled him close, and Pyon bent down to give his new friend a lick. Julian collected his juice and took the food and his passengers back to the hard and uncomfortable chair.

Linis was desperate for reassurance and affection—desperate full stop, in fact. Did that mean...? Julian felt a chill in his chest. Was Zachary...dying? He hugged the two kems close to him and bit his lip. Would the hospital tell him if he was?

But Linis seemed in good health, and surely if Zachary was on the verge of death, he wouldn't be. He just seemed rather lonely and worried. All Julian could do was try to reassure him, let Pyon play and groom him, while he ate his scratch meal and wondered what was going on behind the closed doors of the emergency ward.

Linis disappeared from time to time, and Julian worked out that he was popping back to check on Zachary. But he always reappeared in minutes, distressed and in need of more affection. Julian finally asked the receptionist if there was any more news, but she couldn’t or wouldn’t tell him anything more than he already knew.

Time dragged on. As night fell, the waiting room emptied of the families and the idlers, leaving only the truly desperate and worried, and even they mostly disappeared as they received news or their friends and loved ones came out, bandaged or clutching a bag of medicine. Every so often people would stagger in either drunk or clutching a bloodied head or hand. Their friends would hang around while they were treated and then leave.

Julian alone kept a vigil all evening. Zachary would probably be utterly bemused at him doing so, but he just...had to.

At one am, a taxi pulled up outside and a tall, elderly man carrying a smart, compact leather suitcase, came in through the glass doors. Julian guessed at once who it was, and went over to him. Though the man had to be seventy at least, he had the same elegant bone structure and lean physique as his nephew—and the same green eyes.

“Are you here for Zachary?”

“Why, yes.” The man seemed completely taken aback at being accosted by a stranger. “I'm Leo Underwood, his great uncle. Who are you?”

“Uh, Julian Godwin. He...we work together. Um...he’s a friend.”

“You must be—is that Linis? Goodness, what are you doing here, little fellow?” He reached out and patted Zachary’s kem affectionately. His own kem, a small white creature, materialised then and walked down his arm to sniff and lick at Linis’ face, and then Pyon’s. “You and Zachary must be close.”

“Um, not exactly. They won’t tell me what’s happening with him. He was hit by the car just near my apartment. We’d been jogging together—I feel awful.”

Underwood smiled wearily. “Not your fault, so don’t. Let me speak to whoever I need to. Could you look after Linis while I do that?”

He left his case with Julian and then went over to the receptionist. He was taken almost immediately behind scenes, leaving Julian with the two kems to wait again.

It seemed to take forever, though the clock on the wall said it was only fifteen minutes before Leo Underwood reappeared. He looked far more tired and depressed—the news couldn’t have been good. Julian stood to hear the worst.

“Is he going to be okay?”

“They’re not sure. He’s in critical care right now. The injuries were severe.” He rubbed his eyes. “To be honest, Julian...they warned me he could die.”

“No,” Julian whispered.

“I'm afraid so, yes. But he’s stable, and I believe he’s being given excellent care. They told me to return in the morning, to leave a contact number with them. I’ll stay at Zachary’s apartment.”

“You could stay with me, if you like. His place isn’t far from mine...and...um....”

“You want the company? Have you been here all day?” Julian nodded. “My dear boy, you must be exhausted. I accept your generous offer—a sorrow shared and all that.”

“What about Linis?”

“Let me talk to him. May I have your telephone number to give the doctors?”

Julian scribbled it out, and the address—and his name, just to be sure—and Underwood took it. “Let me sort this out. Give me Linis, and if you could call a taxi?”

It was good to have someone who could make decisions—who could get information, even if it was bad news. When Julian finished ordering the car, he found the man talking seriously to Linis in a low voice, his own kem listening intently. Then he straightened and Linis disappeared. “I asked him to keep an eye on our boy while we get some rest. He understands we can’t be here all the time.”

“How do you know, sir?”

“I just do,” he said, smiling tiredly. “Please, call me Leo—‘sir’ makes me feel my age and I really don’t need any help with that. I hope that taxi comes soon. I'm not as young as I used to be, and it was a tiresome flight.”

Julian was a lot younger but he felt exhausted by this worrying day and all the waiting. The old man had to be close to passing out. Since he couldn’t directly help Zachary, he decided he would help Zachary’s uncle—and maybe learn a little more about the mysterious Mr Ledbetter. It’d be a distraction from worrying himself sick, at least.

They spoke little in the taxi, except to exchange the names of their kems—Leo’s was called Nuji, and Pyon was already his fast friend—and for Julian to explain his relationship with Zachary a little better.

“I, uh, don’t know the names of his other friends. Are you going to call his parents?”

“I can’t. They’ve been dead for over twenty years.”

“Oh.” Julian replayed that conversation in his head and mentally smacked himself. It hadn’t been hostility—just deep discomfort, possibly even grief, which had made Zachary go all cold. “No other relatives?”

“None, unless you count distant second and third cousins that neither of us have ever met. There’s just me, and like you, I don’t know his friends either. You’re the first one I’ve ever met. I'm glad he’s found someone so loyal.”

Julian opened his mouth to say he’d do this for anyone, then shut it. If Leo wanted the illusion of a close friendship, what harm could it do? For all he knew, he was Zachary’s best friend—which was a lonely, depressing thought in itself. “He can’t die,” was all he said.

“I hope not. He’s young and fit and the doctors said he had more than a fifty percent chance of making it. I'm a great believer in those kinds of odds, Julian. Are we nearly there?”

They were. Getting up the stairs and opening his front door suddenly felt like enormously difficult tasks. But finally he was home. That morning, Zachary had eaten breakfast with him in this very place. Their dirty dishes still sat in the sink. His heart went tight. Zachary just couldn’t die.

He set Leo’s suitcase down and tried to think what needed to be done. “I, uh...need to change the sheets.”

Leo shook his head. “Please, Julian, I’ve slept on mud floors. I just want to lie down. Politeness can wait.”

Julian was too tired to argue, though he did put out clean towels and checked the bathroom was still respectable. He didn’t even bother making up the sofa bed - he just grabbed his pillow from the bedroom, swapping it for a spare, clean one, and picked up a blanket. He was asleep in seconds, Pyon clutched close to him.

He dreamed and he had nightmares, but when he woke, shuddering, the memories slipped through his fingers, only leaving sadness and confusion. He took a few seconds to work out why he wasn’t in his bed, and what had woken him—the answer was the same thing. Leo. The man, dressed in a black and gold silk bathrobe, puttered quietly enough in the kitchen but the unfamiliar noise—soft clinks of someone trying to find mugs in a strange kitchen—had been enough to interrupt Julian’s sleep.

He checked his watch. Just gone seven o’clock. Just over twenty four hours since.... God, he hoped Zachary was all right.

Leo paused in the middle of pouring from the teapot as he spotted Julian was awake. “Oh, I'm sorry, Julian. I desperately needed some tea.”

Julian yawned and waved away the apology, wrapping the blanket around his shoulders. “Did you call the hospital?”

“Yes. No change. Which is good. The longer he survives, the better his chances, so they told me.”

Julian found it hard to match the optimistic smile, but he did his best. Nuji perched on Leo’s shoulder and Pyon scrambled over to play. The two kems ended up on the floor, chasing each other. Julian wondered about Linis and how he was doing.

“We’re going back this morning, right?”

“Of course. Now I'm here, you don’t...but yes, of course you do. Forgive me. And your company would be welcome, but eat breakfast first. It’s going to be a long day. I’ve done this kind of thing before.”

If the old man hadn’t been there, Julian would have skipped it and gone straight back. He was grateful to have someone making him be sensible. Finding breakfast for Leo, forcing himself to shower and shave carefully, thinking about what needed to be done for his guest’s comfort, was a welcome distraction from his anxiety.

He was more than a little concerned about the stress on Leo, especially when Leo let slip he was closer to eighty than seventy. “You could wait here, you know. I could let you know what’s going on.”

“No, I must go. Beside...the doctors said that someone may have to make...but let’s not talk of such things. It won’t come to that.”

“You mean, decisions about turning stuff off? You can’t!”

Leo winced. “I may have to. I'm his next of kin, Julian. These things must be faced. But not now, and perhaps not at all.”

“He’d want Linis kept alive!”

“I'm well aware of that. I promise I won’t make any decision on such matters without talking to you, and considering every possibility. But you see, I do need to be there, though I should go to his apartment first, and see if there’s anything that needs to be tended to.”

Once Leo had showered, and Julian had cleared up, they set out. They walked because the apartment was so close, though Julian had stiffened up just as Zachary had predicted. He thought sorrowfully of the day in the country he’d hoped to have—it seemed so long ago they’d talked about it, just the day before.

Leo, despite his age, was quite sprightly on his long legs—another similarity with his great-nephew. Julian wondered how close the connection was, and as they walked, he asked about the relationship. “Did you raise him? He must have been a kid when his parents died.”

“Ah, sadly no. My sister and her husband—his mother’s parents—brought him up, though I’d have dearly loved to have done. My niece, ah, didn’t exactly approve of me.” He smiled sadly. “But my sister and brother-in-law passed away several years ago. There’s just Zachary and me now. I’ve known him all his life. A fine, caring young man.”

“How old was he?”

“When his parents died? Only seven. It was an airline crash—he was staying with my sister while his parents attended a medical congress. Both doctors, you see. The plane developed a critical fault, came down, and everyone on board died. The only blessing was that Zachary wasn’t one of them.”

“Yes.” Raised by his grandparents—that couldn’t have been a lot of fun. “Are you two close then?”

Leo sighed. They’d arrived at Zachary’s apartment building now and slowly climbed the stairs. “Not really, though I’d have liked to have been. I keep in touch as much as he allows. But he’s not really close to anyone, that I know of.”

They let themselves into the apartment. Julian wasn’t surprised to find it spare and clean and elegant, much like its owner. It was as large as his parents’ house—three bedrooms, a large open sitting room, a kitchen and dining area with a long polished wood dining table that might have been an heirloom. One wall was entirely taken up with books, not just law texts but books on dozens of different topics. On a glass side table, a chess game was set up. There were no messages on the answer phone or Zachary’s mobile. No pictures of family or friends featured anywhere, no real sign of the man himself—no degrees on display, or personal touches. The abstract paintings on the wall were beautiful but told him nothing of Zachary himself.

It felt lonely, and a little empty. Zachary hadn’t been there long, though. Perhaps there were things in storage, waiting to be unpacked. Julian hoped so. Pyon and Nuji nosed around but even Julian’s curious kem couldn’t find much to amuse himself with. Sterile, that was the word.

There wasn’t much to do—when Zachary woke up, he’d need personal things, books and so on, but that could wait. Having checked messages and that there wasn’t any food left out that could go off, they headed to the hospital. The only news was that there was no news, but Leo’s arrival meant that they could wait in the more comfortable and private waiting room near the critical care ward, and he could authorise Julian as a visitor. They were allowed to see Zachary—and ‘see’ meant through a window, not in the same room—though Julian kind of wished he hadn’t, afterwards.

“He looks terrible,” he whispered, staring at the monitors and the traction device and all the equipment. And at the horribly battered and pale form on the bed, dwarfed by all the technology. He could barely see Zachary’s face—he was on a breathing machine and the tubes and masks and tapes obscured most of the skin that wasn’t covered in bandages. Did the monitor readings mean he was doing okay or not?

“People look terrible in these situations, Julian. It’s what’s going on inside that counts.” They heard a faint, desperate cry. “Oh, Linis.”

Zachary’s kem came straight to Julian and Pyon, wailing to be picked up. Julian gave him lots of cuddling and petting, Leo and Nuji joining in. “He’s scared.”

Leo nodded. “Yes, and Zachary would be very pleased you’re here to look after him. Come on, standing here and staring won’t do anyone any good.”

For a while, they had the waiting room to themselves. Julian didn’t feel like talking—the sight of Zachary and seeing just how very ill he was, had shaken him up. Leo respected his need to silence, entertaining himself by playing with the three kems, especially Linis. Julian wondered if Zachary knew how much his uncle loved him and Linis both, and really hoped he’d live long enough to discover it, if he didn’t.

A doctor came in close to midday to let Leo know the latest. Zachary was holding his own, and the ventilator was just to take the strain off him, not because he couldn’t breathe without it. “Will he live?” Julian blurted out.

“He’s fighting hard,” the doctor said. “But we’re cautiously optimistic.” Julian grinned at Leo who smiled in obvious relief. “We’ll take him off the ventilator tomorrow if he continues to do well, and we should see him waking up then. Mr Underwood, he’s going to be sedated until then for his own comfort—there’s really little point in you sitting around here. If there’s a crisis, we can call you. You’re not staying far from here, are you?”

“I want to stay,” Julian said.

“Yes,” she said, “I understand. But Zachary will be with us for a couple of weeks or more. He’ll need you when he wakes up. I suggest you take Mr Underwood home, both of you take it easy, and stay where we can contact you. Nothing will happen so fast that you won’t get back here in time, I promise.”

Leo grimaced. “Perhaps...Julian, I think we should.”

“What about Linis? He needs the company.”

The doctor held up her hands. “I’ll leave it up to you. But this will be a long business, gentlemen. Zachary’s recovery will take months. He’s in good hands here, and so is his kem.”

She left them then. Julian sat down and called Linis up onto his lap. Pyon jumped up too, and he stroked them both. “You can go if you like, but I owe Zachary. I can’t abandon Linis.”

“No. We can stay an hour or so. Linis understands, and so long as he knows we’re coming back, he’ll be fine. Tomorrow will be the day we’ll be needed.” Leo patted Julian’s shoulder. “She’s right—we need to pace ourselves.”

“Who did you do this with before?”

“Friends. A lover, once, who had cancer.” Leo’s eyes shadowed briefly. “When you get to my age, you accumulate losses.”

“Did everyone die?”

“Some of them. But Zachary won’t, so let’s not talk of it.”

They stayed until another family came to use the waiting room, so distressed and in need of privacy that it seemed rude to hang around. Julian carried Linis back out to the observation window. The kem made a distressed sound as he saw Zachary lying there, and turned to Julian for reassurance. Julian whispered words of comfort in one silky ear, and petted him for as long as Linis wanted it. But then the kem made it clear he wanted to be set down. He walked over to Leo and rubbed himself against the man’s leg, then went to Pyon and Nuji in turn, giving them sad little face licks. The kems all seemed to know what was going on, and it made Julian feel even worse about depriving Linis of their company. But Linis took matters into his own paws, and with a last quiet meep, he dematerialised. Seconds later, they saw him on Zachary’s pillow, curled up next to his head.

“Do you suppose Zachary knows?” Julian asked.

“I can’t think it does him any harm, and I think it helps Linis. Come on, we should get lunch and look after our little kems too.”

Leo insisted on taking him out to lunch as a thank you to Julian and to give them a break. He was, he confessed, starving since his body clock was messed up, and he was reluctant to put Julian to the strain of catering to his peculiar dietary needs. Julian never ate in restaurants, so had no idea what to recommend. They took a taxi to the city and ended up choosing one at random, which Leo deemed suitable, and Julian thought was well out of his price range. But Leo said it was his treat and he could easily afford it.

“My family are disgustingly rich, I'm afraid. Zachary doesn’t need to work, but he despises idleness as much as I used to. I’ve...grown accustomed to its charms,” he added with a wry smile.

Julian grinned back. He really liked this old guy—even if he wasn’t much like his nephew at all.

The restaurant specialised in seafood, never Julian’s favourite, but he was determined to try it, if only for Zachary’s sake. He let Leo choose, and ended up with a very nice salmon and shrimp pasta. Leo chose a grilled tuna steak, which looked even more tempting. He declined to order any wine, just asking for their best mineral water. Julian didn’t mind—he didn’t drink much anyway. Not since University, at least.

“Zachary would think this was pretty funny,” Julian said, twirling some pasta on his fork. “You should have heard him tear into me about my diet. He was right though—Pyon’s been so much better.”

“Kems are his main obsession, but you probably know that.”

“Do you know why?”

Leo ate a mouthful of fish and set his fork down. “He was an only child raised by elderly grandparents, a shy, solemn boy in a strange school. Linis was the only one he could trust not to hurt him. My sister and her husband were good people, but not...warm. Or should I say, kind but not very perceptive. Zachary retreated inwards, never spoke to anyone about his parents or how he felt. Linis was his security, his friend, and his only comfort. Eventually, I think he decided no one else could ever offer him a fraction of what Linis did, and he stopped even caring if he was alone. But he cared when he was a child. He broke my heart, but I could do so little. I travelled, you see, and was rarely home. I visited when I could, but each time I returned, Zachary was a little colder, more closed in. By the time my sister and her husband passed away, he’d come to live entirely for himself and Linis.”

“But he must have had friends—he went to University, like me, he’s got a job. He meets people all the time.”

Leo shrugged and cut more of his fish steak. “I’ve never heard him mention anyone.”

“He told me he’d known kems who’d died because of their hosts being selfish. It really upset him.”

“Yes, but I doubt he cared about the people. The kems are different.” Leo shook his head. “You’d think he’d be lonely.”

Julian thought back to the strange way the man had dealt with his invitation to go to the country park. “I think he is.”

“You seem to have formed quite an attachment to him despite your early difficulties.”

“No, I...I feel sorry for him. And I owe him. But I don’t know a thing about him, except that he’s rich and he loves kems.”

“Would you like to know him?”

Julian suddenly realised Leo hadn’t mentioned what sex his cancer-ridden lover had been, and flushed at the implication in the man’s tone. “I’ve got plenty of friends.”

“Ah. And Zachary is just another one in a long list. Nothing special.”

“I didn’t...I don’t know him. I feel...responsible. He was hit by that car because I bullied him into breakfast. He wouldn't have even been there if I hadn’t done that.”

“Bullied?” Leo lifted an eyebrow. “Zachary? And how did you manage that, Julian?”

“I...uh...well, I asked him. A couple of times.”

“I see. Which of course left him with no choice, forcing him to come to your utterly execrable and unpleasant apartment, eat your horrible food and then you tossed him out onto the street under the wheels of that car. Is that correct?”

“He wouldn’t have been there,” Julian muttered, staring into his plate of pasta and feeling rather stupid. Leo wasn’t that different from Zachary after all.

“You don’t know that,” Leo said gently. “So if your concern for Zachary is based on nothing but guilt, then in his name I absolve you and release you from any obligation. He’s going to need friends for the long haul. Guilt won’t keep you around for more than a couple of days because let me tell you, visiting hospitals and looking after sick people isn’t fun and it isn’t easy. He doesn’t need someone to play at this, Julian.”

Sharp eyes in an aged face pinned him, and he felt his skin flushing hot again. “I...I didn’t even like him a few days ago. He was a complete snot to me at work.”

“Yes, he’s very good at that. So why are you here with me, worrying about him?”

Pyon yawned just then, and climbed off Julian’s shoulder so he could pick his way across the table to visit Nuji, lying in the crook of Leo’s arm. Julian pointed at his kem. “Because three weeks ago, if I’d brought Pyon to a place like this, it would have been a disaster.”

“Gratitude has no more staying power than guilt, my boy.” Julian sagged. “Why is it so hard to admit that you might just like my nephew?”

“Because...I didn’t, and now I might do, and he might die.”

“And it’s hard, isn’t it? Zachary decided a long time ago he didn’t want to be hurt any more by people leaving him. You see the kind of life he leads. Don’t be like that, Julian. Be brave. It hurts, but your life will be so much richer.”

Julian nodded, his cheeks still burning. “I'm supposed to go back to work tomorrow—I don’t know how I can. I won’t be able to think. I’ve got plenty of leave. I’ll have to ask for the time off.”

“Let me speak to your employers. I’ve handled similar situations before and I think they might be agreeable to you helping the two of us out, at least until the crisis has passed. And I would be very grateful for your company.” Leo smiled, and Julian was again reminded of Zachary—he’d seen so few of his smiles, but when he had, it had transformed the man. Gave a glimpse of a softer, shyer person who might be coaxed out with time and patience. Julian hadn’t ever bothered to try before with someone so self-contained. He began to think it might be worth doing.

“I just want to help.”

“You might come to regret those words. Now, eat up and we can have dessert. I won’t tell Zachary,” Leo added with a wink.

Leo called the hospital after lunch, at supper and then just before they went to bed. The news was encouraging. Not only was Zachary not deteriorating, but he seemed to be a little stronger. The doctors would try removing him from the ventilator in the morning and encouraged Leo and Julian not to visit until that had been done.

“I don’t understand,” Julian said.

“It’s because it’s a little distressing for the patient and those watching,” Leo said. “It’s all normal, I assure you.”

Julian didn’t want to get to the point where this kind of thing was normal. “How long are you going to stay?” he asked.

“As long as Zachary needs me—though I may have to have some things sent to me from my home, and buy some more clothes. I packed in something of a hurry.”

For the first time, Julian dared to think about what came next. Zachary had a broken leg, among many other injuries. He’d be on crutches at the very least—but that apartment of his wasn’t in a very disabled friendly building. And what about Leo? Would he live there too? Would Zachary need a nurse? And what about his job?

He realised he’d assumed he had any role to play—just as Leo had. But when Zachary woke up, which he definitely had to, the man might have very definite views about the matter. And might not be at all happy for Julian to be involved.

“I guess I’ll find out,” he whispered into Pyon’s fur after he’d settled down to sleep. They’d taken the time to make the apartment more friendly for two people, and to make the sofabed up properly, but it would be a bit of a strain to live like this for months. “One day at a time, right?”

Pyon chirped and licked his face enthusiastically. Whenever Julian grew a little mopey about being involved in this mess, he only had to look at his kem to realise that, at least for him, it had been worth it. Not for Zachary though. Zachary would probably curse the day a cheeky little kem had made him spill coffee all over himself.

“Not a lot I can do about that now, eh?” Pyon squeaked again and squirmed under the blankets so he could nest properly in Julian’s arms. Smart boy, Julian thought. Rest was good. Thinking was getting him nowhere.

He remembered more of his nightmares in the morning—Zachary dying, Linis crying before he too, disappeared forever—and could only hope they’d drop off once they were sure Zachary would recover. They weren’t there yet, however hopeful the doctors were.

But there were mundane matters to deal with first. Leo, who was a someone, or at least had once been, used his reputation and wealth to go straight to the top, and Julian had an uncomfortable meeting with him and the most senior of the senior partners down at the office. It was so weird to see Mr Clarke so deferential and polite. Of course anything Mr Underwood wanted was just fine with the firm. Our Mr Godwin is at your disposal, Mr Underwood, for however long you require him, Mr Underwood. Our only concern is Mr Ledbetter’s return to health. We're making arrangements to deal with his caseload, and he shouldn’t worry about a thing. Do let us know if you need any further assistance, Mr Underwood. Our firm is at your service.

Julian found himself in a taxi on the way back to the apartment before the dazed feeling wore off.

“What did you say you did before you retired?” he asked his deceptively innocent-looking companion as they drove away from the building.

Leo gave him a slightly wolfish grin. “It’s a more a matter of who I know. And who my family were. I don’t usually play that game. But it’s nice to able to, don’t you think?”

Julian could only nod mutely. It had been ever so slightly scary seeing Leo pull rank on the terrifying and normally not at all genial Mr Clarke. “You think they’re going to take it out on me when this is over?”

“My boy, they’ll probably promote you.” He patted Julian’s knee. “Don’t worry about it. Let me call the hospital.”

The news he received meant the taxi was redirected, Julian holding tightly onto Pyon as they drove. Please be okay, he begged Zachary in his thoughts.

They were asked to go to the waiting room. Julian couldn’t relax, couldn’t even sit for anxiety. “What’s taking so long?” he demanded as he paced.

“Calm down, my dear boy. You’re upsetting Pyon and Nuji.”

He made himself sit down and set Pyon on the floor so he could race over to his new friend and clamber up Leo’s leg. “They said they’d removed the ventilator. What’s the problem?”

“I don’t know, Julian. Be calm. There’s nothing we can...hello, Linis.”

Zachary’s kem rushed straight to Julian, who swept him up into his arms to cuddle and comfort him. But Linis didn’t seem so distressed—more as if he’d simply missed them all. Julian frowned at Leo. “I don’t understand—”

The door opened and a nurse put his head in. “If you’d like to see Mr Ledbetter now, you can, but only for five minutes.”

Linis squirmed out of Julian’s arms and ran out of the door, the most undignified thing Julian had yet seen him do. “That’s a good sign?” Julian asked hopefully.

“I think so,” Leo said, smiling with annoying calmness. “Nuji, please go inside. I think three kems will be two too many.”

Julian took the hint and asked Pyon to retreat as well. Then they followed the nurse out to the ward. They had to wash their hands and put on masks and gowns—for some reason kems didn’t bring in germs, but their hosts were another issue—before they were allowed through to Zachary’s bed. The breathing apparatus was gone, but he looked worse. One side of his face was covered in dressings, and he had two black eyes. What wasn’t bruised or cut or covered in bandages, was as white as the sheets he lay on.

Julian hung back while Leo approached. He held his breath as Zachary opened one swollen eyelid, and seemed to say something. Leo took his uninjured hand and bent low to talk to him in a whisper. Julian had a sudden feeling that he had no right to be here. He wasn’t family.

But then Linis pawed at his leg, wanting to be picked up. Which was odd because surely he should be with Zachary. Julian picked the kem up, and drew closer to the bed. Leo stood up. “Zachary, Julian’s here. Look.”

Zachary had his eyes closed again, but he opened them a slit. “’Lian? L’is?”

“Yes, I’ve got him,” Julian said, trying to hold Linis so Zachary could see. “We’ve been making sure he didn’t get too lonely while you get better. Here, Linis. Go to him, he needs you.”

He set the kem on the bed—Linis picked his way delicately over all the cords and tubes and drip lines so he could sit near Zachary’s head. A faint smile switched briefly on Zachary’s dry lips.

“’on?”

“Pyon? He’s fine—just being discreet. He and Linis have been playing together a lot, and Nuji. When you get out of here, you’ll love seeing them. Zachary, you have to get better, okay?”

What an inane thing to say, he thought angrily. But Zachary just smiled again, and whispered something Leo bent low to catch.

“He says he’ll try,” Leo reported. “You do that, nephew.” He squeezed Zachary’s fingers and then nodded at the nurse who signalled to them that time was up. “We’ll be back soon. Just rest and get well, my boy.”

They were ushered out and stripped of their gowns and masks. Leo wiped discreetly at one eye with a spotlessly white handkerchief. “Well, well,” he said, his voice a little clogged. “It seems he really is going to make it.”

“Yes.” Julian flicked quickly at his eyes too. Amazing how seeing someone just open their eyes and talk, could be so moving.

Leo cleared his throat and patted Julian’s arm, leaning a little as if looking for support. He looked rather frail, as if all the strain had caught up with him. “I just want to speak to the doctor if I can before we leave.”

“Let me find him. Take a seat.” Before you fall down, Julian nearly added. He waited until Leo had done that. “Pyon?” His kem popped up, nose twitching curiously. “Stay with Leo, will you?” He lifted Pyon down onto Leo’s lap. Nuji appeared too and the two kems cuddled together quite happily.

Leo looked up with moist eyes. “I was so afraid,” he whispered.

Julian gently squeezed his shoulder. “Me too. He looks bloody horrible, but he’s going to make it. Linis knows it too, that’s why he’s so cheerful.”

“True. Yes—they’re wise little things, aren’t you,” he said, patting the two mischiefs in his lap.

The doctor took a little while to find, but when she came, she gave them more reassurance. “We should be moving him out of critical care in the next twenty-four hours. Then we can move him down to the orthopaedic ward.”

“I’ll pay for a private room and whatever he needs,” Leo insisted.

“Then you’ll need to fill out some paperwork. He’s still far from well, you understand, and we’ll have to operate on his leg when he’s stronger.”

“How long before he can come home?” Julian asked.

She pursed her lips. “At least a month, and he’ll need a good deal of support when he does. You may have to make modifications to his home and so on, but you’ve got plenty of time to organise it. Now I don’t think he’ll be up to any further visits today. Call tomorrow morning and we can update you on his status.”

“Thank you, doctor.”

Leo turned to Julian. “Let’s go home. We have some planning to do.”